Memphis, TN
I already stated the goal: break 80 at Colonial Country Club. The Colonial Country Club where they used to play the PGA tour. The CCC where my mind locks up and I can’t seem to get over the hump. The CCC that measures 6,991 yards form the tees we play, a 74.8 rating, and 138 slope. If you don’t play golf or if you’ve never played Colonial, it’s tough.
I was more relaxed than usual on the way to the course. I was fired up to be playing golf, especially there, but I was still calm. 80 was in my head. I met the guys at the course: Brad, David (Brad’s father-in-law), Greg (Brad’s buddy forever), and Stick (Brad’s bud and my former boss). We were playing a fivesome. These guys are good. Not PGA good, but low 70’s good. I am always a bit nervous to play with them because they are better than me.
We started. I went last, after they had all pounded drives down the fairway. I sliced one right. Two off the first tee, but my second duck hooked. I took the first one and was off. Par is 72. Seven over is my limit. After the first 5, I was 3 over. On number 6 I drained a 50 foot putt for birdie. On 7 I missed a 3 footer for birdie. On 9 I rolled in a 18 footer straight downhill for a par and a front nine of 39. I was on my way.
The back nine started off erratic as I missed the green on all 10, 11, and 12. But my putter was working and I had some luck on my side. I made a 15 footer on 10 for par. I missed a 4 footer for par on 11. I hit a sand wedge on 12 that went too far, but the pin was in a bowl. It rolled off the back shelf and back down to 4 feet. Made it for par. 4 over after 12. 13 is listed as the toughest hole on the back at 421 yards over water and a killer green. I pounded a drive, maybe my best ever there and had 172 in. I got out my 5 iron. I shanked it! Right into the woods. It rattled around and after 3 minutes of looking Brad found it. I knocked it around for a double bogey. 6 over after 13. I muttered some words under my breath. I was in great shape, sitting in the middle of the fairway. I was afraid the Colonial curse was coming on. It can just reach up and grab me. I stood on the 14th tee where I’ve put many balls in the water. I duck hooked my driver way left. I scrambled for a bogey 5. 7 over after 14. All over. All done. Many expletives in my head.
I should notate that I am a very mellow guy. Yet, when I get on the golf course, the Gemini in me tends to come out. Mr. Hyde rears his ugly head. I’ve been trying to tame my temper for along time. My friends laugh at me. My dad gets mad at me. I sometimes make it miserable for others out there. But, lately, I’ve been getting better. 15 is a par 3. The pin was tucked in the back right corner. I hit a 4 iron to the back center of the green. It was a well hit shot. I was about 45 feet away, with a downhill left to right big bender. I stroked it and watched it roll and roll and roll and into the cup for birdie! After 15 I was 6 over. I had two par 5’s coming up and had a shot with 2 pars and a bogey. 16 is a par 5 that can be reached in 2 by the big guys. I hit a good drive that scraped some trees but shot me out in the fairway. Lucky. I hit a 9 iron across the water. Another 9 iron put me pin high at about 25 feet out. I wussed the putt, but still made the second. After 16 6 over. 17 is a dogleg right par 4 with a huge valley. I hit a decent drive and had 180 out. I lasered a 4 iron. The pin was on the left side of the humped green. My ball hit the center and decided, against my wishes, to trickle down to the right side. I had about 50 feet, up the hill, down the hill and about 15 feet break from right to left. I almost made it. It rolled past about 3 feet. Stick gave it to me, but I wanted to make it for my 80. I missed the dang thing! I made a bogey. I was furious. First I was mad at Stick for giving it to me. He didn’t know what I was shooting for and I wasn’t playing in their team game. But, I missed the putt. He didn’t. I then felt the curse coming back to me. I was now at my line; 7 over after 17. A par on 18 gives me a 79. A bogey gives me the dreaded 80.
I’ve never played 18 too well, especially when I needed to. 18 is a par 5 with water all up the left side. The fairway slopes left. There are bunkers along the right side. I hit my driver off of the tee. I smacked it pretty good and it drifted right. It hit hard and rolled into the fairway bunker. Ouch. I had a good lie. I took out my 5 iron. I wanted to advance it. I hit it solid. I had 135 yards left. The pin was stuck in the back left. This brought the water more into play. I was contemplating a hard 9 iron or a soft 8. I had been hitting the ball solid all day, so I went with the 9. I was afraid if chunked it I would be wet, but I wanted a full swing on this. What they say on the PGA is true, about the adrenaline. Geez, here I am, a hack, comparing my 18th hole to a PGA Tour thing, but that is how it felt to me. That is the pressure I put on myself. How stupid. I took the 9, reared back and “shwooft.” I nailed it. “C’mon baby, be enough!” It was. It hit in front of the pin, right at the pin, and stopped 6 feet away. All I had to do was 2 putt from 6 feet. I sunk it for birdie and a 78! After 8 years, I had done it. After say 50 rounds, I had done it. I felt like a PGA player who won their first tournament. A monkey was off my back.
I did it. 78.
3 birdies, 7 pars, 7 bogeys, and one double bogey.
27 putts.
7/18 greens.
6/14 fairways.
I go to sleep tonight a happy man. I have played that course enough to be able to replay every hole. I played a few holes in my head the night before. The Colonial Curse is gone.